Hope you enjoyed Part 1. Have you been hugging your children and telling them that you love them? Have you been giving them a safe space to express themselves without scolding, criticism or impatience? Did you talk less, ask and listen more? If you have, great!
Remember, Shichida believes that the right brain pathways close when a child senses negative emotion and is stressed, afraid or bored, in which case right brain training and interbrain training will not yield the expected results.
Shichida teaches us that there are 6 important points to remember when viewing our children:
1. Don’t look at their shortcomings.
2. Don’t look at the present form as the completed form, know that the child is growing and progressing.
3. Don’t be a perfectionist.
4. Don’t compare. Every child has a potential to be the best.
5. Don’t place priority on academic achievements.
6. Learn to see the child as perfect – just as he/she is.
A Shichida parent will Love, Praise and Accept his/her child.
Now, in my next Shichida post and still on the fundamentals, I want to share with you what we are trying to achieve with Shichida parenting. Here, I will give you some food for thought first. Have you read Roald Dahl’s fictional 1945 tale, “The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar”? I read it as a child and it made a great impact on me. It truly is a wonderful story. Here is a summary, which I copied off the internet (with minor edits).
Henry Sugar is a 41-year-old Englishman, wealthy and idle. He is a selfish playboy (he is unmarried because he does not want to share his money with a wife) and greedy (he is always looking for ways to increase his wealth). He inherited his wealth and he has never learnt anything or done any work before. He likes to gamble and is not above cheating to win. One weekend, while feeling bored at a friend’s mansion, Henry wanders into the library and discovers a book titled: "A Report on an Interview with Imhrat Khan, the Man Who Could See Without His Eyes" by Dr. John Cartwright. Henry reads the whole thing. The book talks of an Indian man, Khan, who comes to see Dr. Cartwright to get confirmation of his ability to see without using his eyes. The doctor seals his eyelids, fills his eye-sockets with dough, lays a thick pad of cotton-wool on his eyes and bandages his hands with two rolls of 3-inch bandage. To the doctor’s surprise, Khan walks out the hospital, takes his bicycle and proceeds to ride out into the bustling honking traffic. Amazed, the doctor invites Khan to have supper with him and asks Khan to explain how he developed this magical power.
Khan tells the doctor his story. As a young boy, he was fascinated with magic and ran off to be a magician's assistant. He was terribly disappointed to realize it was all trickery and sleight of hand. He decided to learn the strange power called yoga. It was hard to find a teacher, because Khan wanted to learn yoga for fame and fortune, and real yogis refused to teach him for those reasons. Eventually Khan managed to locate a yogi called Banerjee, and he watched in secret as Banerjee levitated during meditation. The yogi discovered him and became enraged, chasing him off. Khan went back every day though, and eventually Banerjee agreed to recommend him to a yogi friend for instruction. So Khan began the yoga training. He learned about focus and concentration. He described all the exercises he did. After three years of exercising he was able to walk over glowing embers, and after this success he decided that he would concentrate upon this exclusive aim – to see without his eyes. So every night, he lighted a candle at dead level to his eyes, stared at the black part of the flame, then shut his eyes and concentrated upon one single object. At the age of 24 he was slowly beginning to develop an inner sense of sight. At 29, he was able to read a book blindfolded, “seeing” with other parts of his body. Dr Cartwright is amazed with Khan's story. He decides that it must be published, that Khan's abilities might pave the way towards helping the blind see and the deaf hear. However, before he can speak to him again the next day, he learns that Khan has died in his sleep.
Having read this report Henry Sugar realises that if he could train himself to do the same he could make a fortune. So he tries the trick with the candle-flame. Surprisingly his progress is remarkable. Henry thinks he must be the one-in-a-million person who is gifted with the ability to acquire yoga powers at incredible speed. At some time during the 10th month of his training he becomes aware of a slight ability to see an object with his eyes closed. And that’s when he tries the thing with the card. And it works! His aim is to see the reverse side of a card in four seconds. After three years and three months of exercising he reaches his aim and goes to his favourite casino and wins a lot of money. When he gets home, he realizes that he doesn't feel as happy as he expected. The yoga training has changed his outlook on life. In the morning, he throws a 20-pound note to someone on the street and realizes that charity makes him feel good. Without a thought, he throws the entire pile of money out the window. A riot ensues and a policeman comes to question him. Henry is astonished when the policeman berates him for not giving the money to a worthy cause, like a hospital or orphanage. Henry decides the policeman is right and formulates a plan. For the next twenty years, Henry travels the world winning fortunes at casinos and, with these winnings, his personal accountant sets up orphanages in every country Henry visits. By the time Henry dies, he has over 144 million pounds and set up 21 well-established, well-run orphanages scattered about the world.
I want to mention that Roald Dahl’s character, Imhrat Khan, is based on the true story of an Indian man called Kuda Bux. Kuda Bux even had his own CBS tv series. In 1934 he allowed a team of experts and scientists to seal his eyes shut with dough, tinfoil, gauze and layers of woolen bandages and astounded them by being able to still read from books placed in front of him. In 1935, in front of an audience of scientists from the University of London Council for Psychical Research and news reporters, Kuda Bux walked across a 12-foot pit of burning coals unscathed. In 1937, he amazed onlookers in Liverpool by walking the entire length of a narrow ledge of a roof 200 feet above the ground while blindfolded. In 1945, Kuda Bux skillfully rode a bicycle through congested New York’s Times Square while his eyes were taped shut.
Ironically, in his later life, Kuda Bux lost his eyesight to glaucoma. Yet, he still managed to reproduce his amazing abilities. Most astoundingly, when not blindfolded, Kuda Bux required reading glasses to read fine print. Whilst blindfolded Kuda Bux would read the dates on coins which are held on a spectator’s hand, read the fine print of a magazine, thread a needle, duplicate words he had never seen written, shoot a bullseye with a pellet gun, and many other mysteries. When asked how he could see, Kuda Bux explained, “I can see due to the power of my concentration. I bring my attention to a finer level of my vision. It’s my power of concentration.” Kuda Bux paused briefly then stated, “My back was broken in three places. Doctors said that I would never walk again. With my concentration I was able to heal myself. I have no problem walking now,” he asserted. And when asked “Can anyone learn to do this?”, Kuda Bux affirmed, “Yes, you can develop your power of concentration by gazing at the gap between a flame and the candle. Do this just a few seconds at first,” he explained. “After some time you will be able to do this for much longer.”
Now, what part of "The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar" made the deepest impression on you? Think about it - your answer will be relevant to the question of what results you expect to see from the Shichida Method. So think about it, and in my next Shichida post, I will share with you the aims of the Shichida Method.
Delayed Gratification
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